One of the magic ingredients we get from practising kundalini yoga is “saibhung”. It’s a Gurmukhi word that means self-existent. With a consistent yoga practice, we develop for ourselves an unshakeable reliance on our inner strength, a deep knowledge of our own divinity and a fierce courage to face whatever life might send our way. I felt particularly inspired by this passage from the KRI Level 2 Authentic Relationships Guide. It’s a description of how saibhung goes beyond physicality, beyond sex appeal, beyond everything to be the single ingredient that makes us most attractive:
“Beyond similarities and differences, there is a stronger factor: the feeling and perception that the other person is secure in themselves; they exhibit the quality of self-love, self-security, and a sense of completeness and autonomy which we call saibhung. No matter where you may personally lie on the scale of security or insecurity, introversion or extraversion, Aries, Libra or other astrological types, the person who is most attractive is someone who is secure, self-contained and who is confident within themselves. Their capacity for self-love, not narcissism or vain entanglement with the ego, is the quality that attracts and allows you to authentically connect with and love another person.
“A robust capacity for self-love establishes a secure center within us. That secure center empowers us to deal with the many polarities and paradoxes that make up our internal mental and emotional life. From that place of stillness within our consciousness we can appreciate and optimize all of our characteristics and quirks, act with true flexibility and master the power of forgiveness for ourselves and others. It opens the way to naturally using the neutral mind and leads to better decisions that are more creative, effective and subtle.
“That sense of self-completeness and self-love we call saibhung is actually the most unshakeable and fundamental similarity. It is self-similarity in our spirit, psyche and values. It represents a state of congruity and integration of the many parts of our personality and our existence. We also call that self- consistency. We perceive our self accurately. We love our self. And we see that each action and thought is qualified through the consciousness of that self before and as we agree to it. No condition of the environment can shake that security. We deliver to our self and to others trustworthiness and confi- dence. Instead of self-conflict we show self-determination to be who we are.
“To attain saibhung, we need a real experience of our true self and a sustained relationship with it. Yoga creates that secure base. Beginning with the yoga between the mother and child and continuing on as we cultivate a dynamic union of our polarities each day—our inhale and exhale, our conscious and our subconscious, our finite and infinite parts of our being—we master the swing of opposites and hold to a clear center of consciousness from which we can sustain authentic relationships.”
Exerpt from KRI Level 2 Authentic Relationships p52-54
To develop self love and saibhung, try this beautiful kundalini yoga meditation – http://www.yogigems.com/reverse-adi-shakti-kriya-2/#sthash.IjCrPF1r.dpbs